Electricity
by Pearledtears
Summary: This story happens in Twilight, when Bella and Edward are in Biology, and they feel an electric current flowing between them... What will happen. Where will this lead to? Please read it's my first fanfiction!Rated T just in case...
1. Chapter 1

** Electricity**

**Chapter 1**

** Electrocuted**

I do not own any of the characters in this story; they are all Stephenie Meyer's property. Some of the dialogues may be from her books, but I do not own those either. Thank you.

"Mr. Banner backed into the room then-what superb timing the man had-pulling a tall metal frame on wheels that held a heavy-looking, outdated TV and VCR. A movie day- the lift in the class atmosphere was almost tangible. Mr. Banner shoved the tape into the reluctant VCR and walked to the wall to turn off the lights. I was stunned by the unexpected electricity that flowed through me then…"

Edward's POV

It was shocking what happened the. The second the lights switched off, I felt my body jolt from an unexpected current of …electricity? That's what it felt like. And it really would've been a big jolt to make my body react that way; vampires don't just get shaken up like that at anything. Odd…

All of a sudden, I felt an overpowering urge to reach out and touch her, Bella. It really was incredible what that girl could do to me. Was she even aware of her power over me? At all?

By now, I was really using all my strength, psychological and physical, to _not _touch her. I had my fists clenched tightly around my waist. I kept repeating to myself: " No, Edward, you don't know how she'll react, don't, you don't know how she feels about you, just don't!" But on the other hand, something was urging me to do it, just one little touch, only her hand.

I was literally battling with myself. And I didn't know is this would ever happen again; I only had one hour. So I decided to take a peek at Bella. She was in the same stance as I and peeking shyly, or so I thought , at me from under her lashes.

I grinned at her, finding it ironic that she was in the same situation as me. Could she feel it? That odd electricity flowing between us? From what I could tell, she did. However, I knew it'd be bad of me to do what my heart desired, hadn't I told her it'd be better if we weren't friends? But hadn't I just denied all of that by stepping into her life constantly? What I was feeling right now was nothing like the craving of her blood. It was just as strong but, different. War broke out between my emotions. There she was, Bella, the reason for all my troubles, yet the one I _wanted,_ sitting so close. I'd only need to reach out…

And then I realized that Bella might as well know my feelings, now, sooner than later, before it was too late and she'd gone with someone like that _Newton _guy. Ugh. She was most likely to run away screaming eventually, better make it before I grew too attached, though I knew it was too late for _that._ And so that's when I touched her for the first time.

I reached down and gently, ever so gently, picked up her hand from where it was tucked around her waist. To my dismay, she tensed. However, she quickly relaxed when I looked her in the eyes. Now that I was holding her hand, I was alarmingly aware of the renewed strength of the electricity. My mind was a jumble of pictures, images flashing by s quickly even _I _couldn't keep up!

And then I felt warmth seeping through my veins. How long it had been since I'd been _warm! _I could feel fire, a very gentle fire, burning up my veins and making my blood course through them. Wait a second! My blood? I didn't have blood! It was the oddest sensation, and I could've sworn that my _heart_ was _beating_. Incredibly, I felt alive again.

I was so warm and comfortable. I had a newfound energy pulsing through me. I glanced at Bella, she obviously wasn't feeling the same thing, for she was relaxed, the image of serenity, as she gazed into my eyes. She had a peaceful smile playing on the corners of her pouty lips and all trace of her former tenseness had vanished. And it was when I looked deep into those chocolate brown eyes that I became aware, really aware of the jumbled images bouncing in my mind…

Sorry it's short. the first few chapter may not be great, but please give me a chance... review please! it's my first fanfic... thanx!


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

**Confused Thoughts**

A/N: Thank you soo much to those of you who read and reviewed. I owe special thanx to my four first reviewers: loudie, VampireGirl04, Apocalypse1 and bella raven cullen. You guys have no idea how much it helps! Thanx to all the ones who put my story on favorite story and story alert. You all rock!

Once again, these characters and some dialogues are Stephenie Meyer's property.

EPOV

It was dizzying, all those images flashing by so fast. And it just wasn't normal for a vampire like me to get dizzy because of images swirling in my head. I had never seen so many thoughts in my head, yet I wasn't hearing them! So, basically, they couldn't _be _thoughts. Hey! Hold on a minute! Thoughts? Whose thoughts?

I concentrated more deeply on the thoughts in my head. Topaz and onyx eyes, bronze-colored hair, pale skin, flashing white teeth… That looked all too familiar. It was _me!_ Someone in this class was thinking of me! The thoughts continued: insanely fast driving, Bella being saved from getting hit by a car, topaz eyes again. And then the thoughts changed abruptly. Charlie seeming worried, Renee looking doubtful…

That's when I understood. I was _seeing Bella's thoughts! Bella's _thoughts! It seemed impossible to me because all I had ever seen in her mind was a black void; and I definitely hadn't _ever _heard anything from _her _mind! I was stunned. There was _nothing _normal about this phenomenon; I had already seen pictures in peoples heads, but they didn't _think_ in pictures! They thought in their "voices'! But, in typical Bella fashion, her thoughts _weren't _normal, they_ weren't _voices. They were a consecutive row of _images!_

So now I knew that Bella _did _think of me at times. I didn't want to admit it, but I was so thrilled! Did this mean that she cared for me as I cared for her? I knew that was impossible though because _no one_ could love as much as I loved Bella, though that was kind of in my subconscious. I relished the heat that was now pulsing through my body. I could remember only one other time I had felt that…

It was so long ago. The last time I remembered feeling _alive _.Feeling my heart beat and my blood pounding through my veins. I could remember feeling the wind blowing in my hair and all the small delicacies of life that I'd been so aware of ninety years ago. This all came flooding back to my memory when I held Bella's hand in that moment. It was as if she had given me back my … _humanity._

That's it! I felt human again! In that moment, I _knew _what I had been missing. I was missing a part of me. Missing life itself, and all it's simple pleasures. Bella was giving that back to me right now and I felt so happy, so… _in love._

Yes, I felt in love, and I knew then that I would give the world to Bella if that was what she wanted.

"Edward, the movie is over."

I was jolted out of my trance-like state when I heard her gentle voice.

"Oh.Right." I grinned at her. "Let's get out of here."

I was still holding her hand, but the queer electricity had gone when the lights had turned on, leaving me to wonder if I had made it all up. I was feeling 'normal' again; cold and dead. But it had all felt too real, and I knew that I _had_ experienced such a thing. I also knew exactly what my soul was missing; Bella, the love of my life. And it was that day that I knew that I would _never _want to let her go. She had completed my being, and I knew that if ever I left her, I would feel empty, once again.

So Bella and I walked to our next class, in silence, both lost in our own silent thoughts. I couldn't see hers anymore. When we arrived at her class, I hesitated before letting her go. I wanted to touch her, but not as subtle a touch such as just holding her hand. I wanted to show her a bit more of my feelings for her. I was torn between my family, and Bella. I knew that if I touched her more, my unquenchable thirst for her blood would awaken and rage inside of me. Just to think of it made my mouth water.

I wish I could say I just walked away and let Bella live her life in peace, but I didn't. Instead, I went against everything my brain screamed at me and followed my heart's desire. I slowly raised my hand and stroked her face, from her temple to her delicate chin…

Sorry, it's another filler chapter… don't worry the action will begin soon!

Please review!


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

**Questions**

A/N: Thanx to everybody who reviewed! I finally got a longer chapter going! Sorry it took a while! Hope you like it! Please review. Oh, and those of you who like Bella POV fanfics here is some from her POV!! PLEASE REVIEW!

**Bella's POV**

When I felt his hand on my face, I felt a shock similar to the one I had felt in Biology zap through my body. What was it? I hadn't felt anything like it before, but then again, I hadn't ever met anyone like the god standing before me either. And now he _touched _me!

Later, in my dreaded _gym _class, as I watched my "team" play volley-ball, (basically, only Mike, Angela, Jessica and me, but I was considered too dangerous to take part, so I "watched" and "learned".) I went over every detail of his face. Questions were pouring through my head. Did Edward really like me? How could I be so lucky? I was _never _lucky! Gym class dragged on, but I was only thinking of him. After what seemed like an eternity, class finally ended, and I rushed to the locker rooms to change and leave.

"Hey! What's the big rush, Bella?" ,Mike strode over. Damnit! He was the _last _person I wanted to see right now. Reluctantly I turned around.

"Uhh… I'm not really in a rush, just glad school's over, I guess." Don't make this be long, please! I thought to myself, while forcing myself to smile.

"Oh, okay. So, did you see my super catch in gym?" Shit. Of course I didn't! The only thing I saw during gym class was Edward's face!

"Umm… Yeah, oh my god, it was great! You should really join the school volley-ball team!" Make him go away please!

"Really? There's just one teeny problem. There's no volley-ball team." Ugh. When will he leave?

"Oh, stupid me."

"You're not stupid, Bella, why, I find you perfect!" Jeez. What a cheesy kid.

Just then, Jessica called Mike over. I would have to thank her profusely for that. But she'd probably wonder why I would be thanking her. Oh, well, so long as Mike was gone, I would thank Jessica mentally.

" Oh, well, bye Bella!" he seemed sincerely sorry to leave, but I wasn't.

" Bye, Mike, good to see you!" I said that more cheerily than was necessary.Oops! Oh, well.

As I dove out of my prison, and was about to fall down, yet again, one strong arm reach out and caught me by my waist and stood me up. I looked up into a pair of mocking topaz eyes.

"In a rush?" asked Edward, smiling my favorite crooked smile.

"Not anymore." I blurted out. Typical, stupid me.

Then he took my hand and we headed towards the parking lot. I noticed that his Volvo was being mobbed by his siblings. the electricity appeared again, just as strong as ever. I knew Edward felt it because his smile faded and a questioning look replaced it.

" You can feel that too, can't you?", I murmured, knowing he'd hear me.

"Yes. Yes I can," he frowned, ' and I don't know what it is."

"Does that bother you?"

"No, it's a lovely feeling, isn't it?", he gazed at me and his eyes darkened. " It's such a strong pull, I just can't resist touching you", he sighed, "and _that's _not good." A pained expression crossed his face then, similar to the one that he'd had when he stroked my face earlier on.

"How could it be that bad?', my throat was knotted.

His eyes blazed. "Because I could _kill _you, Bella." I knew better than to argue when his eyes burned like that. However, I didn't want to accept that. I hated it when he spoke to me like that. As if it were impossible.

" I know what you're thinking, Bella."

" No, you don't, you may think you're a good guesser, but it takes more than that, this time." Why would he say that?

" Then you'll be surprised.", he grinned and my heart melted.

" Surprise me then", I was trying not to stare at his gorgeous face.

" You hate it when I talk like that", he frowned. " As if it were impossible."

I was snapped back to reality. "What?"

He laughed. " I'm surprised too, you know."

I was stunned. "H…H…Ho…How? Wh…Wha…Why?" I was confused, he _couldn't _hear my mind.

" I know Bella. But I really _can _see your mind."

" But, but… that's _impossible_!" I thought I was the only person whose mind he couldn't hear. " You're not _supposed _to hear my mind!"

" Don't worry, Bella, I cant' _hear _your mind.", when I didn't answer, he continued. " I can _see_ it."

This last part confused even more my already mixed up brain. " S_ee _it? What do you see?"

"Well… Your thoughts are a consecutive row of images to me. For example, just now, when you thought, " I hate it when he talks like that" I saw you looking frustrated at my words. Well, it's way more precise and complicated that that but… you can get it, I assume." , he paused, looked at me questioningly, and continued when he saw I understood. " And I can only see it when I'm touching you."

To prove his point, he let go of my hand and said " Think of something."

The electricity faded as he let go of my hand but only slightly; it was still there. I started thinking of Renee and of my old home in Phoenix. "Well?" I asked ,expectant. He was frowning, concentrated. " Nothing" he seemed confused. He took my hand again.

" Well, at least I can have _some _privacy!" I mocked. He laughed, but still looked distant, as if trying to solve some mystery. I looked around, and noted the empty lot.

"Maybe I should get home now, before Charlie does and gets worried." I didn't really want to, I would stay here with Edward all my life. Well, maybe not _here _but I would definitely stay with Edward all my life, had I the choice. I knew it was too early to come to that conclusion, _way _too early, but especially after what I had felt today, I was most certain about that fact. But why would person like _Edward _want _me?_ A plain, ugly, clumsy, stupid and _human _girl like me. Ugh. He was probably under some spell cast upon him by an evil vampire witch. Yep, that made more sense. But as soon as I thought that, my chest was wrenched open by some unknown force and I instinctively folded in half. (Little did I know that feeling would come back often enough in the future…)

" Bella, are you okay?" Edward's voice was alarmed.

" Yeah, fine.", I lied, gasping.

" Right, Bella, I'm not stupid you know. And," he smiled, pointing to our linked hands, " I just got an insider's view of your thoughts.", he laughed his musical laugh.

" And you find that _funny?_", Did that mean I was right about the spell thing?

" Bella, sometimes you're just so silly!", he grinned yet again, flashing his brilliant white teeth, " the only one who's set a spell on me is _you!"_

I looked into his eyes. Bad mistake. I was immediately dazzled into submission and I blushed hot pink. Not wanting him to know the thoughts that went through my head then, I attempted to pull my hand out of his grasp. I was too late however. There was no way I could pull my hand out of _that _grip, without breaking it.

" I'm glad you think that of me", Edward's eyes twinkled and he smiled, then grew serious, " Bella, don't. Don't go through this for me." His face was pleading.

Stubborn as ever, I replied, " It's your fault you decided to see my mind."

" Bella, please don't."

I turned away before his eyes could dazzle me. " I really think I should go now."

" Umm… Bella?"

" Yes, Edward?" I turned around and realized he was still holding my hand.

" My siblings took my car, so I thought I could drive you home in your truck, and run to my house afterwards."

He obviously saw my answer before I said it because he let go of my hand and strode over to the passenger's side.

"Fine. You can rive since it _is _your truck", he grinned.

I just stood there, mouth agape, and finally stalked to my old red Chevy truck. " You're incredible," I mumbled, as I got in. he just laughed.

The drive took awhile because of my very cautious speed on the roads.

" You know Bella, you really should get a better car", he laughed, again.

" But I _like _this one!"

The rest of the drive was spent in silence. We were both trying to find out what the queer electricity between us was. I hadn't felt anything like it with anybody else, but maybe it was because he's a vampire. But then again, he seemed as clued out as I was. When I got home, Edward and I stepped out of the truck.

" Charlie will be here in fifteen minutes," he told me. " thanks for the ride", he smirked, " You sure got us here in record time."

I grimaced. " I'm glad you're so grateful."

" I'll see you tomorrow", he said, then added " sooner than you think." And with that he vanished at the speed of light into the trees. All trace left of him was the gentle swaying of the trees where he'd passed.

" Damnit! I still have to cook Charlie for supper! Uhh…Supper for Charlie." I was still a little confused from the day's activities.

Little did I know that the electricity we had discovered today would change our lives forever….

Hope you enjoyed! I think I'm getting the hang of it! PLz PLZ REVIEW!!!


	4. Answers

**Chapter 4**

**Answers**

A/N: Thank you all for the reviews! It's _very _encouraging!!! I'm gonna put a bit more effort into it now, seeing as so many people are reading; and I'm hoping for more fans!!! hint hint

These amazing characters belong, unfortunately for me, fortunately for her, to the incredible Stephenie Meyer.

**Bella's POV**

The next morning, I was reluctant to awaken.

"Rise and shine, Bella," a musical voice whispered.

My eyes popped open. I searched the room. Nothing. Was I hallucinating? Probably, knowing myself. I closed my eyes again. Just five more minutes…

"No, no, Bella," the voice chuckled softly.

"Yes…," I groaned and rolled over. Considering I _was_ hallucinating, I decided to ignore the voice that resembled way too much Edward's to be real.

"Bella…", it growled. " Get up."

"No," I replied stubbornly, sleepy.

"Fine, then."

A few minutes later, I realized what had just happened. I rubbed the last traces of sleep from my eyes. I had heard _his _voice. And it seemed all too real. Doing a thorough search of my bedroom, I confirmed my earlier thoughts; I was delusional.

I went about getting ready for school, using what I would later call "human minutes". I tugged on a pair of jeans, faded but, who cared? Well… Probably Edward. Oh, whatever, if he was gonna like me, he'd better get used to it. I slipped on an ivory colored sweater. Swiftly, but not deftly, that was impossible for me, I pulled the hair brush through my messy hair, brushed my teeth and charged down the stairs. Amazingly, I didn't slide head first down them; I made it without so much as a scratch. Okay, maybe not, I _did _have a splinter from the wooden rail in my finger, but that was minor detail.

I served myself a small bowl of cereal, swallowing the biggest bites I could manage. That didn't turn out too well; I choked on practically every bite. Finally I raced to the door, opened it, tripped on the step, and fell into waiting arms. I slowly looked up into my savior's face; it wore a mocking smirk.

"Every time I see you, you're in a rush."

"And every time I see _you,_ you save my life"

He laughed. Then I remembered something.

"So _that's_ what you meant by " I'll see you sooner than you think"! You came to get me!" I was happy. More than happy.

"Yep. I was told to pick up a certain Isabella Swan," he grinned.

"Told?" I stared at him, incredulous.

"I'm joking, Bella," he said, matter-of-factly.

"I…Whatever," I scowled; he really _was _difficult to comprehend.

"Come on, I'll be your escort today." He took my hand and dragged me to his Volvo. "Get in", he ordered. I did. I couldn't get over the fact that _Edward _was here for _me_.

He got in and didn't bother to but his seat-belt on. He was so full of himself. The electricity was back; and it shocked me to see just how strong it still was. I wasn't even touching him. It felt like the force of two magnets held slightly apart from each other. Edward revved the engine, it purred smoothly as he steered it out of the driveway.

"Yesterday, I spoke to Carlisle; I was curious to see if he had an answer to the questions we have about the electricity that connects us." Edward began, "Unsurprisingly, he did. He says it's kind of like static electricity that unites two beings. He calls the phenomenon magnetic attraction." he paused. "He says he's only seen, or heard of it, once before. Only with him and Esme. He said that's what kept them together for so long, Carlisle likes to say that it only happens when two people have perfect 'chemistry'. It's extremely rare; and that I'm lucky to experience it," he hesitated.

I urged him to go on. "And?"

"And well, that it can have two sides; a bad one and a good one. The chances are 50-50."His face sobered. " He also added that if the attraction I'm feeling with you should push me too much, I should go as far away as possible because it could endanger both our very lives. He said I would know soon enough if it's good or bad." Edward's eyes had darkened.

I looked out the window, we had arrived; I hadn't even realized it. I had been so enthralled in his theory; well, the real theory. I was scared. I didn't want to lose him. No way. Not now that it had just begun. He was the only good thing in Forks. He looked over at me, and I could see pain in his eyes. I knew he wanted to touch me, so did I. I leaned a little closer to him. He leaned in a little closer to me. The pull was unbearable.

Suddenly, his eyes abruptly turned onyx, and I leaned away; I knew what that meant. I thought of what he had just said. "It could endanger our very lives…"

"I'm so sorry, Bella, sometimes I really hate myself, you know…" His eyes were clouded over.

"Oh, don't be, Edward." But I was scared of what this meant. It was probably that stupid evil vampire witch playing her games again, playing with Edward's heart.

"Let's go to class." He suggested. We stepped out of the car. He took my hand. I was surprised.

"We might as well enjoy it while we can." He explained, answering my silent questions.

He dropped me off at my class, and strode away, gracefully as ever. Mike raced over to see me.

" Hey Mike," I said wearily, I was going to be more polite today, but not overly enthusiastic.

" Hi, Bella!" _He _certainly was overly enthusiastic. We walked into class.

At lunch time, Edward came to get me and we walked hand in hand to the cafeteria, to a separate table. He gazed at me longingly. I was getting sick of this. I just wanted things to be normal.

"Oh, Bella," he sighed.

"Yes, Edward?"

"I think we're gonna take what we can from this. Saturday, I'll bring you somewhere. I know it's risky to be alone, but we both agree it might be our only shot at this don't you?"

"Yes, I do, best make the most of it," I breathed. He was dazzling me again.

After lunch, we went to Biology. This time, when Mr. Banner brought in the T.V and shut off the lights, we were slightly more prepared to what happened. This time, however, we held hands the whole time, and the only film we saw was our reflections in the other's eyes. Time sped by then. But it slowed down dramatically again when I got to gym class. I managed to avoid Mike; I knew I wouldn't be able to pull off another conversation. Lucky for me, he seemed preoccupied by Jessica.

School finally ended. Edward drove me home. All of it passed by in a daze for me. Except for the part when Edward leaned in to tell me good-bye, and breathed his beautiful scent right in my face. He slowly skimmed his nose down my cheek. That moment made me become jell-o.

Afterwards, I wobbled into the house, and was greeted by the oddest spectacle…

Hope you liked it!! PlZ review! Oh, and for those of you who enjoy great fanfics go read my bf on ffnet Cristalake's fic My Last Breath. It's worth it! REVIEW PLEASE! Don't worry, soon, in a chpter or 2 it will be Edward's POV for those of u who like it.


	5. Surprises

**Chapter 5**

**Surprise**

A/N: Thank you all sooo much for the reviews!!! You guys rock!!! It helps very very very much!!!! Hope you enjoy the coming chapter!!

I do not own any of the following characters; they are all property of the legendary Stephenie Meyer!

**Bella's POV**

I stood there, just staring. I was so dumbfounded that I forgot about my earlier depression. Standing before me was Mike, Jessica, Angela, Taylor, Eric and Lauren. Why were _they _here? They soon answered my unspoken question.

"Surprise!" Oh.Oh. I _hated_ surprises.

When they saw my blank look, they explained themselves.

"We thought it'd be nice to go out for dinner tonight, you seemed a little put off at school today", Mike said, ever the gentleman, or should I say, the golden retriever.

"MIKE!" the others yelled in unison. "You weren't SUPPOSED TO TELL HER!"

"Actually, I'm happy he did," Mike looked at me hopefully. I wanted to say: Because I can't go. But I couldn't say no to that face. "But… Well, I need to cook supper for Charlie." What a lame excuse; and they thought so too.

"Aww, Bella, come on, you know Charlie can take care of himself." They were begging. Ugh. I would have trouble getting out of _this _one.

"But-," They cut me off.

"No 'buts', you're coming." Then they mobbed me and dragged me down the driveway to the car they were using; it was Mike's parents' car, and we could all fit in, because it was a seven-seater. They buckled me in before I could protest and Mike revved the engine and sped off- okay not quite as fast as Edward, but fast enough for a human. I groaned inwardly. I couldn't stand surprises. But, then I told myself, maybe it would get my mind off Edward a little bit. So I stayed in silence for the whole trip.

When we got there, they pulled me out of the car. However, I was not so reluctant this time, I knew this was good for me, well, I convinced myself of that. We all walked into the restaurant.

"This was very thoughtful of you guys," I forced myself to say.

"We thought it'd help you to see your other friends once in a while," Mike said, "That _Cullen_ guy seemed to have gotten you depressed today," he spat that last part out as if it were venom. I rolled my eyes.

We sat down. I noticed then that everybody was dressed very formally. I felt out of place with my faded jeans and ivory sweater.

"Should we order?" Jessica asked.

"Of course", I wasn't all that hungry.

As if on cue, the server walked over to our crammed table and took our orders.

"I'll take the Caesar salad and some Coke please." I didn't pay attention to what the others took.

"So, what's all the fuss about?", I asked.

"We told you, you looked depressed." Eric said.

After a short amount of time, the server came back with our plates. There was a casual conversation taking place, mostly about the next dance, school, etc. etc. I ate mostly in silence, only speaking when need be.

"Well, maybe we should go now", Taylor said after what seemed like an eternity of silence.

"I agree", Lauren said.

So we all slid out of the booth and headed back to the car.

The drive home was mostly in silence. They dropped me off at home. Charlie was there, watching football, as usual. He knew where I had been because I had left a note for him.

"How did you manage supper?"

"I'm not a baby you know!", Charlie replied.

I laughed. When it came to supper he was. "Anyway, I'm going to bed."

" But it's only 9:30." He glanced at me.

"I know, but I still have to take a shower."

" Good night"

" Good night"

I stepped into the shower. The hot water unknotted my tense muscles. Man, that felt good. I lingered there until the hot water ran out. I took my time to untangle my hair and get into pajamas before heading to my room.

When I got there, I only barely stifled a scream of surprise.

Sorry for the short chapter, it's just a filler. Next one will be BPOV but the one after that should be EPOV.Sorry for the cliffhanger. Actually, I'm not! LOL. If you enjoy cliffhangers read my best friend on FFnet Cristalake's fic My Last Breath. It's a killer!! Anyway hope you liked it!!

REVIEW!!!!!! It helps SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And, it's EASY!


	6. Scare

**Chapter 6**

**Scare**

A/N: Thank you all so very very much for the reviews. It helps mightily. I have a feeling I am getting more fans. I really appreciate your efforts into putting up reviews!!! Keep it up and don't be scared to add some more!! (hint hint) To those of you who like Edward's POV stories, the next chapter will be his POV, I promise. I also appreciate advice for my chapters like hugmefrooty gave me and also Cristalake. Do not be afraid to give me ideas or to point out my errors or things I could've done better to me. For those of you who R, R, R&R (relax, read, rest, review), GOOD JOB!

I do not own any of these characters.  too bad…

**Bella's POV**

"It's about time you came," a dangerous, gruff-sounding voice murmured.

Of course, I couldn't see anything in the darkness. I was getting more afraid by the second. However, I didn't want Charlie to come and 'save' me from any trouble, until I knew it was trouble. Maybe I was stupid to do that, but that's just me. Stupid, naïve and clumsy. I ventured a step forward. I was all wobbly from my shower _and _from fear.

"What took you so long?," it growled.

"Wh…What do you mean," I stuttered.

"Where have you _been_?," the voice was dangerously low.

"Wh…Why would _you _care?", I really shouldn't be answering his questions

"I've been waiting for you," it whispered, and it seemed like the voice came from right beside me, but when I turned, I saw nothing. Then, it growled, "Bella".

My heart skipped a couple of beats before settling in a normal pace again. Normal, as in extremely quick.

"How do you know my name?," I asked, trembling,

It all happened too fast for my slow brain then. I felt an unbreakable grasp around my waist and a freezing hand clasped around my mouth, so try as I might to scream, I uttered no sound. I should've called Charlie before. Damnit. I couldn't bite either. Ugh. Perfect. Looks like I won't see Edward tomorrow.

I was flying through the air and landed with a soft thud on my bed, still locked in those arms of iron. Then the voice laughed. A soft musical laugh. I was petrified with shock.

The hands were gently sliding down my face, taking in every detail, every bump, and every dent. The fingertips were so cold. I was pinned down on my bed, and an all too recognizable shape was hovering over me.

"Edward," I breathed.

"Did I scare you?," he laughed silently.

"Of course not," I replied sarcastically. "I get kidnapped every day,".

"It's way too easy with you," he grinned his crooked smile.

"And you find that _funny?_," I whispered, disbelieving. "You know, not all humans are used to being freaked out of their minds by vampires before going to bed," I immediately regretted my open interpretation of him. He didn't seemed bothered by it though.

"You'd better get some sleep now," he leaned in close to me.

"I don't think I'll be able to, with you around."

"I can leave if you want,"

"No!," I didn't want him to leave. Then I thought of something. "Aren't you thirsty?,"

He smiled mockingly. "I went to the restaurant too."

I was relieved. If it was that much easier for him, then good. Now that my fear had faded away, I was extremely aware of the electricity, stronger than ever, flowing between our close bodies. Laying beside me, Edward let his fingers linger on my face for the night…

The next morning, I awoke with a jolt. My first thought was 'Edward!'. Had I dreamt the whole thing? No way, I was certain of that. However, he was nowhere to be seen. I couldn't help a rush of disappointment. Then, I glimpsed a small square of paper on my bedside table. It read: I'll be waiting. The excitement I had felt last night flowed through my bones again and I dressed and breakfasted faster than ever; that is, the fastest possible without killing myself.

Before I opened the door I felt a surge of uncertainty. I quickly opened it though and the feeling disappeared when I saw a shiny silver Volvo resting in the drive. I stride over, or I tried to, and Edward casually appeared before me and opened the car door, signaling me to get in.

"How did you sleep?," he asked, casual as ever.

"Very well, thank you. That is, _after _being kidnapped,"

He laughed. Revving the engine, he gracefully steered his car out towards the road. I realized his brothers and sisters weren't around today either.

"Where are your siblings?," I asked.

"They took Rosalie's car," he turned his eyes on me, and I noted that they were a honey-colored topaz today. Good, he should be in a good mood.

"Okay," I couldn't believe he did all this for _me._

"Oh, Bella."

"Yes?,"

"I mentioned taking you out to try our chances for the electricity thing, remember?," he parked his Volvo in the school lot.

"Yes", I murmured.

"Well, tomorrow is Saturday and I thought I'd bring you to one of my favorite places, that is if you don't mind being alone with me," he hesitated.

"Of course I will!," that was too quick an answer maybe, but it was true,

"So, anyway, when do I pick you up, then? Will Charlie be gone early?"

I smiled happily. "Yep, he's going fishing._ And _he thinks I'm going shopping in Port Angeles! You can pick me up at the normal hour.,"

His features darkened "You shouldn't be too happy about that. You're practically coming to meet your death! Please tell somebody that you will be with me, for you own sake, Bella," He forced me to look at him, lifting my chin to meet his gaze.

"I'll _maybe _tell somebody I'm with you, just maybe,"

"Bella," he groaned. "Anyway, let's go."

He hopped out of the car and was opening my door before I could bat an eye. I stepped out into the muggy atmosphere. He took my hand and walked me over to my classroom. Mike was waiting there for me. Edward chuckled under his breath as he saw the thoughts that crossed my mind. Sometimes, I really appreciated what the electricity permitted. I didn't even have to speak my thoughts aloud.

I couldn't say that there were any disadvantages to it, except that it could be the cause of our eventual separation. How much I hated thinking of that! It ripped open my chest agonizingly. Thoughts really do have a lot of power over minds.

"Bella, you better get to class now," Edward whispered in my ear.

He let go of my hand and Mike led me into class.

"Last night was pretty fun, wasn't it?," he grinned a toothy grin at me.

"Sure it was, I'm very grateful to you guys. Thank you very much."

We took are seats beside each other (how I wish he were Edward). The teacher began his long sermon. The hour-long class seemed to last forever, and I didn't understand too much about it either. But after some time, Mike picked up my school books and led me out of class, to where Edward was waiting.

"I'll see you later, then, Bella," Mike said, shooting a hate-filled glare Edward's way.

"Okay,"

Edward grinned at me, and took my hand, to lead me to my next class. I wished this routine would never end. When Edward stopped again, I realized we were at my next class, and I reluctantly walked in, the same as before. But now even _Mike _wasn't there to un-bore me. Class, took forever again, but I somehow managed to survive it.

When I walked out of class, I was met by Edward, again. It was lunch time by now, so we walked to the cafeteria and picked up a tray of food. Edward picked a table apart from the people we knew. We sat down.

"So, how was your morning?," he asked conversationally.

"Grueling," I smiled at him.

He grinned back. "So tomorrow, you don't want to sleep in? I can pick you up later, you know."

"No, no," I wasn't going to put this off.

He laughed. "You really aren't scared of me," he looked surprised.

"Hmmm…"

"Well, I guess you will be after our day tomorrow," he whispered under his breath.

"And why is that?,"

"Because it will be sunny,"

I laughed. "It can't be worse than transforming into a bat."

"I guess we'll see about that,"

When lunch time was over, Edward and I went to Biology hand in hand. It was much more interesting this time because I actually could see and touch the man of my dreams.

The rest of the day continued at this pace, and Edward finally drove me home at the end of it. We both got in his Volvo, but he paused mid-way in as if listening to something. I looked over to where he was staring. Jessica and Lauren were staring from a little ways off. Edward must've heard their thoughts.

"Edward, what's wrong?" he turned around and laughed.

"It looks like you have admirers," he pointed discreetly to Jessica and Lauren. "Do you want to know what they think of us?"

"Sure," I was eager to know.

"Here's their conversation,"

"_Oh my god. That's _Bella _and _Edward Cullen!!_" That's not fair! He's so not for her. I would soo be a better match!" _Lauren thinks.

"_(Gasp) How could he? H…he…he's _mine!_ That gorgeous little rat! Bella! (Snort).Why would he refuse _me_ and take Bella?" _Jessica's thoughts.

"_Humph!"_

I laughed along with him when I heard that. He started the car and drove out of the school parking lot. We laughed the whole way home; I couldn't believe how self-righteous they were.

After a tiny amount of time, we were at my house.

"I'll be here, bright and early tomorrow," Edward smiled at me.

"Good,"

As I was about to open the door to get out, Edward grabbed my hand and pulled me close. The electricity shot down my spine, chilling me. He gently lifted my hand to rest on his face. It was so cold. Then he leaned his face close to mine and approached his lips very close to mine, slightly parting them…

A/N: I know I'm going to kill you with _that _cliffhanger! Have fun… Muahaha!!! (Laughs evilly)

PLEASE REVIEW!!! NEXT CHAPTER IS ACTION AND FLUFF!!!!


	7. One chance

**Chapter 7**

**One Chance**

A/N: Thank you all again for the reviews!!! This chapter should please all of you who like Edward's POV and even if you don't prefer those, I'm sure you will be interested because THIS IS WHERE IT _FINALLY_ STARTS!!!! REVIEW REVIEW!!!!

**Edward's POV**

Bella was definitely anticipating the kiss I was going to give her. She leaned in closer and closer to me, waiting. I decided then I'd wait until later to kiss her; in fact, I really shouldn't even be _considering _it. But, just in case our relationship didn't work out well, I didn't want her to think I was blindly in love with her and that I would keep us together no matter what. I truly _was _blindly in love with her, but she shouldn't know that. As for keeping us together, well, I would always do what was best for her.

I slowly leaned away from her, and she sighed. I was disappointed too, as a matter of fact.

"I guess you should go in now," I murmured, signaling her to open the door. "I'll be here as soon as Charlie leaves," I grinned at her.

"Okay," she whispered back, "Don't be late."

I chuckled at that. Me, late? For Bella? Never. Bella walked out of the car and stepped into her house, I backed the car out of the drive and headed home. Would I really be able to cope with, now, both temptations; the electricity forcing me to touch and hold her and the ravenous craving of her blood? I decided I would talk Alice into hunting with me tonight.

When I stepped in the door to my family's house, I was greeted by a chorus of 'hellos' from all around me. I couldn't see them, but I knew exactly where they were.

"Hi, Emmett, Rosalie," I acknowledged the first two I saw.

I ran up the stairs to my CD-filled room, only to see Alice sitting on my bed, waiting for me.

"So, you need to go hunting, huh?' she asked, jumping up from the bed.

Of course she knew, what with all the visions she had. And _I _now knew that she would come, from hearing her thoughts.

"Yes, I do," I said seriously, "I just can't risk being with Bella on an empty stomach."

Alice rolled her eyes. _Empty stomach,_ she thought,_ he hunted yesterday._

"I know you won't do anything to her," she smiled sympathetically. "But I guess you don't."

When I had first taken the decision to get to know Bella better, my whole family had looked at me apprehensively. They were all worried as to how this relationship would work out. Rosalie still didn't accept it; I was afraid she never really would, but that was just Rosalie. Alice had been the most supportive to this point, and I appreciated that. Carlisle seemed to trust me but he was still worried, knowing the strength of the craving for her blood and the electricity. Esme just wanted the best for me, she had always been very motherly. As for Jasper and Emmett, well, they were still wondering how the hell I was going to get out of this one; I didn't know either, only that I didn't want to get out of this. It was understandable that they thought that way though because Emmett had experienced this before and it hadn't ended well and Jasper used to be a 'carnivore', so to speak.

"Anyway, I'll come," she said. "Let's go just here to the park, okay?,"

"That's fine. Thank you Alice."

"You owe me one", she laughed and ran down the stairs.

I followed behind her and we went to the park. I hunted down a couple of deer and when I was certain, my thirst was enough in check I went to find Alice.

"So, are you feeling any better?" she asked me, smiling from ear to ear.

I snorted. "We'll see tomorrow, I guess" I replied.

Alice suddenly frowned. All her features darkened and her eyes clouded over, leaving her in a trance-like stance I knew all too well. Visions.

"Alice? Alice! What do you see?", I asked, frantic.

She didn't answer and abruptly woke up. "That's not so good", she muttered under her breath.

"What's not so good? Oh, Alice please tell me!", I was freaking out. It couldn't be about Bella, it just couldn't.

She stared at me for a long while before replying, "Be careful tomorrow, Edward." She vanished into the woods and I was petrified with shock so I couldn't didn't follow her. What really frustrated me was that I hadn't been able to hear her thoughts except for; '_it's his only chance though, so I really shouldn't tell him. But what about Bella?_' And I didn't like the sound of that. Maybe I shouldn't bring Bella to the meadow the following day. But I had promised her, hadn't I? So I would go along with my plan, but I would keep myself in check, no slacking off, for sure.

All through the night I sulked around waiting for daybreak. It was so long. Incredibly long to wait for her. After about eight consecutive hours of listening to music I walked downstairs and was met by my whole 'family'.

"Good luck, Edward." Carlisle looked deep into my eyes, wondering if I'd be up to it. Alice had probably told him about her vision.

"Take care, Edward," Esme smiled encouragingly at me, thinking: _I hope this works out. _I hoped so too.

"Watch out for her Edward,' Alice whispered, blocking out her thoughts from me. Very frustrating. This was supposed to help me protect her, but if I didn't know…

"Do what your instincts tell you, Ed.," Emmett laughed, remembering the human women he had enjoyed. I glared at him through narrowed eyes and Carlisle reprimanded him. "Stop that right now Emmett!" he growled.

Rosalie just glared at me and Jasper looked at me uncertainly.

With that I walked out the door and hopped into my Volvo, not trusting myself. I drove swiftly over to where Bella lived; quickly making sure Charlie was gone before I drove in. I hoped desperately Bella had told someone she was with me, otherwise I couldn't bring her.

I walked over to the door and knocked three times. Soon enough I heard quick, unsteady footsteps and fumbling with the doorknob and lock. Finally Bella opened the door and grinned when she saw me. Who else would it be? I chuckled. I noticed we she was wearing the same colors as me; ivory sleeveless top and jeans. She was gorgeous, as usual. I laughed.

"What's wrong?," she looked down frantically, blushing deep crimson and checking herself.

"Oh, nothing. It's just that we match." I laughed again as realization crossed her features. "Well, should we go?"

"Yes, but," she glanced at me, "I'm driving."

Reluctantly, I agreed. We walked over to her old slow red truck and she got in the driver's seat. This was going to be long, I realized. She shoved her key into the ignition and her truck lazily roared to life. Bella cautiously made her way down the street. Then I remembered to ask her if she had told anybody she was with me.

"Does anybody know you're with me?"

She smiled with satisfaction. "Kind of."

That didn't sound promising. I snapped. "Kind of?!" What do you mean kind of?!"

She stammered upon seeing my reaction. "Uhh…Well, Jessica kind of knows."

"What does she know?" I hadn't meant to snap at her like that, so I softened my tone.

"She thinks I'm going to Seattle with you," she glanced at me,

I relaxed slightly. "I guess that'll have to do," After a while I saw the exit we had to take to get to the meadow. "Take this exit," I said. This had taken a lot longer than it should've, but at least I was with Bella.

She steered her monster sized truck onto the dirt road.

"At the end of this road, there will be a trail,"

"Were hiking?" she asked, uncertainly. Uh, oh. Maybe she didn't like hiking.

"You don't like hiking?" That wasn't too great, the hike was rather long, for a human that is.

"Uh, sure I do," I wasn't convinced of that.

"Okay, park yourself here," I said pointing to the side of the road.

She did and we hopped out of the car. I pulled off the sweater I'd been wearing and revealed the sleeve-less top I too was wearing. She gaped at me, blushing when I smiled at her. She started walking in the opposite direction I had been planning.

"Bella? Where are you going?" I asked.

"Well, I'm taking the trail." She replied, stopping.

"I never said we were taking the trail," I laughed.

She paled considerably. "No trail?" she squeaked.

Why was she so scared? "I can take you back if you want, Bella."

"No, no let's go. Lead on."

I was still worried. "What's wrong, Bella? I know something is wrong, just tell me. Please?" I knew she wouldn't be able to resist those eyes.

"Well", she blushed crimson. "I'm not naturally balanced, let's say."

I laughed. "Oh, Bella! You're so silly! You really had me worried then!"

She looked at me, confused.

"It doesn't matter! I'll help you out!" I laughed again, lighthearted.

"I don't need help!" she scowled.

Now it was _my _turn to be confused. Bella _never _reacted the way I expected her to.

"Okay, well it's this way." I took her hand and we headed down into the wood.

The hike took longer than I expected, what with Bella tripping every now and then. I could feel the electricity pulsing through my veins, zapping me constantly, pulling me to her. I could see all her thoughts, and the main one was: _Why does he like me? An ugly clumsy thing like me._ I would have to clear that out with her later. I could scent your luscious blood pounding in her delicate veins, and the temptation was as hard to resist as ever.

After about an hour of walking at Bella's pace, we reached the meadow. She gasped and ran into it, marveling at nature's beauty. I let go of her hand, to stay in the shadows, where she wouldn't see my skin.

After a thorough tour of the round little meadow, she turned and saw me.

"Come on." And then she caught on. She walked over, closer to the shade of the trees. "Don't worry, Edward, I promise I won't be scared,' she said gently, urging me to come. The electricity tugged at me and I stepped into the meadow, letting the sun turn my skin to sparkling marble.

Bella gasped. "Oh, Edward," she breathed, staring in awe at my skin. I sat down in the sun, and she came beside me. I was happy to note that she wasn't running away screaming or anything of the sort. That said it all. I was happier than ever. My soul was filled, and I was certain in that moment nothing, could content me as much as Bella did.

I lay down on my back and Bella began tracing the lines of my veins on my arm. It amazed me how much stronger the electricity was now, more tempting than ever before. Bella didn't seem to mind her more restricted 'thought privacy' that much, she seemed as awed an as happy as I, from what I saw in her mind. She was in love. In love with _me _.A monster like me. I was so very happy. I completely relaxed in her touch, letting my eyes close, and letting her thoughts invade my mind. I let the zapping electricity pulse harder than ever through me, not resisting that temptation. I was making sure I was keeping my other desire, her blood, in more of a check however.

After a long while of Bella tracing my arm, I sat up. Bella jumped. I would have to learn to watch out to how brusquely I moved around her still. I gazed at her for a long time, enjoying her delicate features, and her wavy auburn hair flowing around her frail shoulders.

"Is it hard for you right now?" she whispered.

"It will always be difficult, Bella. But you are what I want," I smiled gently. "You know that." The luscious scent of her blood filled my nostrils, tempting me yet again. "I'll show you, don't move."

I softly laid my head against her chest, my nose skimming her collarbones, scenting her blood. I felt her freeze, not so tensely though. She trusted me. But I didn't, and I remembered Alice's warning. I let my hands slide down her waist and back up her arms, to go back up to her face and find her cheekbones and forehead. I traced her soft, pouty lips with the tips of my fingers.

After going over very inch of her face, I removed my hands and let them rest on her lap.

Bella gazed at me, losing herself in the depths of my eyes. ( I knew that because I saw her mind.)

"Don't move," she murmured. As if I would. It was her turn to trace my face. She let her fingertips slide gently around my eyes, over my nose, and contouring my lips. I tensed, and she hesitated, but I relaxed right away, resisting temptation again. She continued down my neck, over my collarbones and ending at my wrist.

In a flash movement, I flipped over my wrists, catching her by surprise, and I locked hers in my hands. I pulled her close, very close, and her faces was barely an inch from mine.

"Did you know?" I breathed into her face.

"Know what?" she asked, mesmerized.

"That I love you?"

"No, I think you'll have to tell me again, just so that I can believe you," she murmured.

"I love you," I whispered.

"So do I,"

Then I slowly held her face in my hands and pressed my cold, slightly parted lips to hers. I heard her heart skip a few beats before it settled into a breakneck pace. The electricity was almost torturing me then. It was zapping incessantly through me. Always pushing me for more, always more.

After a while, I pulled away, because Bella's lips were unyielding. What had I done wrong? I looked at her, only to see that all her weight was being supported by me and that she had fainted. I really panicked now. Had I killed her? Had venom accidentally slipped into her mouth? I didn't know I could kill someone that way, but I guess it was never too late to learn. Had this been what Alice meant by 'watch out for her'?

**Bella's POV**

When Edward had started kissing me, though it was not the most passionate kiss, the electricity jolted through my body so hard it _hurt._ My heart was racing. Feeling his cold lips on mine was more than I had ever imagined. It was just too much for my frail being, so I just fainted. Just like that.

I couldn't believe Edward _loved _me, and I knew that I would never forget this magical moment. Ever. I just wished that my life could go on like this forever, but nothing perfect stayed, right? I desperately wished I could deny that…

**Edward's POV**

Bella woke up a couple of minutes later, seeming dazed.

"Oh my god, Bella!! You're alive! Are you okay? Should I bring you to Carlisle? I'll bring you home, I promise!", I said frantically.

"Whoa, Edward, breathe. I'm alive, nothing has happened. I just fainted. It's normal, okay?"

"Bu..But, I thought I killed you! I couldn't even see your thoughts anymore!"

"I'll tell you why I fainted. It _is _your fault though," I giggled.

Edward paled, if that was possible.

"I fainted because you're just too good at everything, silly!"

"Too good? Why would you faint then?"

"Because you're the one I love, and it's just too good to be true."

I relaxed. Everything was okay. I hadn't killed her. Thank God!

We lay down one beside the other for what seemed like hours. Not speaking, just enjoying one another's company. I thought of what Carlisle had told me. 'You'll know if the electricity is bad if it pushes you too far'. It didn't seem like that. Maybe our relationship would work out after all. But all this still left Alice's 'prophecy' about danger. Maybe it had just been the kissing thing. I really hoped it was.

I saw the sun lowering in the sky and suggested we leave. I was reluctant to but I had to get Bella home before Charlie did.

"I should bring you home now, I guess," I whispered in her ear.

"I guess so," she was as reluctant as I.

"Come on, I have a faster way back," I laughed, knowing it was a _way _faster route.

"Great,"

"Get on my back,"

She looked shocked. "What?"

"That's right", I grinned.

I picked her up and slung her gently over my back. When I was sure she was secured on I told her: "Hold on tight."

I flew through the trees. I loved this feeling of freedom. I was so happy to be able to share it with Bella. I was so happy to be myself with her. We made it back to the truck in one tenth of the time it took us to get to the meadow. I stopped, waiting for Bella to get off. When she didn't seem to want to, I told her we were there.

"Bella, you can get off now, you know,"

"Uh, yeah, okay. I'm just a little dizzy."

That was not good. What had I done? I was going to kill the poor girl.

"I think I need help."

I gently peeled her hands off from around my neck, which would have been a 'stranglehold' had I been human. I slid her to the ground, making sure she landed on her feet. Of course in the split second it took me to turn around Bella had crumbled to the ground and scraped her knee on a rock. Blood started gushing abundantly and I didn't have time to take myself in hand.

Bella stared at me in horror as my eyes turned onyx and I advanced on her, unconsciously letting my instincts govern my mind and body. As she crawled away on her hands and knees she scraped herself even more and more blood spilled out of her.

"Edward, don't! It's me Bella. You love me remember?"

He paid no heed to my pleadings and braced himself to lunge….

**A/N: ha-ha!!! I'm going to kill you guys, I know!!! PLEASE REVIEW!!! I'm not going to update until I have 60 REVIEWS!!!! So if you want to know wats going to happen, you'd better REVIEW!!!!!!! Hope you enjoyed!!!**


	8. Author's Note

**Author's Note**

Really sorry!! I hate to sound like a coward but… My pony is going to be euthanized within the next couple of weeks and I will not be updating as fast as I thought… All my apologies…. Don't worry though, I _have_ started chapter 8, but it will only be posted this weekend. I didn't know I get 60 reviews so fast!!! Really sorry again!!! I appreciate all the reviews and thank you for your support!!! I'll make sure the next chapter is worth it!!

Pearledtears.


	9. Gone

**Chapter 8**

**Gone**

A/N: Thank you all for the reviews!!!! I couldn't believe how fast they came!!! Special thanx to maraudergurl and CC. (But… I have a feeling you are the same person. Am I right? Correct me if not) Anyway, clever, I wasn't expecting to have to post so soon. Thank you very much though, it is encouraging. But please,( I know I don't sound grateful for all the reviews, but really, I am) next time no cheating. Those include, no two people in one kind of thing(if that's the case, it's just a lucky guess), and try to review only once. LOL! It's just because me and my best friend on FFnet (Cristalake) are doing a competition to have the most reviews at ten chapters but if I get "fakes" it doesn't make it fair for her. Anyway, here's another chapter, sorry if it took longer to post than I thought.

**Bella's POV**

I was crawling backwards away from his threatening stance. I knew my life was over then and there. However, I couldn't make myself be as scared as I should. I knew the love of my life was about to kill me but I didn't want to scream for help. One, it would give him away, and two, I wasn't really able to.

What really terrified me wasn't the fact that I'd die, it was the fact that I'd never again see Edward. Of course, any normal person would've run away screaming, but I've never been normal, why should I start now?

I desperately tried to knock some sense into him. He didn't listen to my reminders of his love for me and mine for him, however. He was a totally different Edward than the one I had known for the past couple of months.

Edward lunged at me; there was no way he'd miss. He pinned me down brusquely. In a last attempt to save our relationship, I sucked in air and tried to scream.

"NO, EDWARD!!!"

It wasn't my voice I heard, though I had opened my voice to utter the same words. Out of nowhere a shape flew through the air and crashed straight into Edward, catching him by surprise and knocking him off of me. I gasped, fighting for breath. He seemed to wake from his trance then.

I realized, having seen her with Edward's family, that Alice was my savior; she had Edward pinned to the ground. I marveled at the strength she had never showed.

I was trembling, of course from fear, but also from cold. Now, why would I be cold? It was probably from the shock.

"Bella! Are you okay?" Alice walked slowly over to me lifting me up gently. I realized my face was probably frozen in a mask of shock.

"Ye…Yea…Yeah… I…I…Th…Think" I managed to stammer.

Edward was sitting a little way off; he looked so much more terrified than me. Alice shot him a vicious glare, something I never would've expected from somebody that looked so innocent. Edward just looked down, and I swear if he could've, he would be crying. He was shaking. I looked away from him and into Alice's eyes.

"Thank you," I murmured

"We should get you home now," she glanced at Edward. "I think _I'll _take you home." She didn't trust him.

I didn't argue, not because I agreed, but because I was too tired. I turned back to look at Edward, but he was nowhere to be seen.

"He left," Alice said, when she saw me. "Don't worry, he won't bother you again."

I looked at her, terrified. I didn't want him to leave. He was my life. I'd die if he did. He couldn't do that to me. No, no, no.

Seeming to think my terrified look meant I was scared of Edward, Alice told me; "I should never've let him bring you."

"No! I'm happy you did! I love Edward! I don't want him to leave! Please, NO!" I was going into hysterics.

"Don't worry, Bella. We'll do what's best for you," She glanced at me worriedly.

I didn't like the sound of that. So far, Alice seemed to think that the best for me was to take Edward away, and that was the _worst_ she could do to me, that would kill me, break me.

"Come on, I'll take you home."

I let Alice drive me home without complaint, even though she was driving at twice the speed allowed. Not one of us spoke during the whole drive home; we made it there way faster than when I had driven to the meadow. _The meadow._ Already, memories, fresh from today were invading my mind.

Alice dropped me off, with my truck, and ran home, after making sure I was okay to walk inside. Charlie wasn't home, he'd be gone until tomorrow. And I'd be stuck here with no news of Edward until Monday.

I trudged inside, lost in my own thoughts. I kept thinking of Edward's face after he'd almost killed me. It ripped me open. I remembered the powerful electricity when he'd kissed me. I remembered fainting because of his kiss. All of it was too much. They could've been good memories. But now, everything was shrouded in darkness for me. I loved him. I always would. Did he not know he was the best thing that had ever happened to me? No, he didn't. And that hurt. Hurt too much.

The evening past in a daze for me. I refused to think, knowing I'd only think of him. I half-heartedly swallowed a bowl of cereal, yes, for supper, and took a long, hot shower. It was only 7:30 when I trudged up to my room to get in pajamas and go to bed, but I didn't take notice of it. The day's activities _had _taken a lot out of me. I just wanted the weekend to pass by quickly, so that I could see Edward again.

I put on a pair of earphones to listen to some music, not bothering to check what CD it was. Before long, I had fallen asleep, even with the music. I woke up a few hours later, realizing this. I pulled off the earphones and started thinking of something. Edward couldn't leave me. He loved me, hadn't he told me that? And why would he leave me, anyway? I knew the answer though. He'd leave me because he wanted to protect me. What he didn't understand was that he would make me more vulnerable to death if he left me. But try as I might to convince him of that, I knew he'd never believe me.'

I fell asleep again, still lost in thought. I dreamt that night. It was nightmarish. I relived every moment of this afternoon, only this time, I died. Everything was the same, only Alice didn't come. I dreamt that I went to heaven, but it wasn't heaven. I was alone. No Edward, no Alice, not even any _Mike!_

I awoke abruptly, drenched in cold sweat. I hated this. I missed him. I didn't care if he had tried to 'eat' me, I knew that would change, it had to. I loved him. He loved me. It was 'chemistry', no?

I remembered Carlisle's theory, the one that we'd know soon enough if our electricity was a good one or not. He had said that if it pushed too much… That didn't look too good.

It was the longest day of my life. I sulked around the house for ages. I even started reading Withering Heights again. I closed soon after though, because it reminded me too much of him.

Charlie came home around supper time, and I warmed up some left over lasagna for him.

"I got us a weekly supply of fish," Charlie stated, grinning.

I forced myself to look happy, anyway, I didn't know if Edward was going to leave me, he never said so. "That's great, dad! Anyway, we'll never run out of fish with you around!"

He merely smiled and took his lasagna to go and eat it in front of the TV, to go watch the football game. I, for the first time in ages, sat down with him. That's proof of how much I was bored and needed to get my mind off things, or more like, Edward.

We sat there for a long time, and when the match got too boring I crept upstairs to take another long, hot shower. I was anxious for tomorrow to come. When I got out, I took the time to dry my hair thoroughly, something I hardly ever do. More proof of my boredom and anxiety. I slowly made my way to my bedroom and slipped on a pair of old PJs.

I fell asleep a couple of hours after laying my head on the pillow. I tossed and turned all night, fitfully tying to drown out the sound of the relentless rain with my pillow. I had never gotten used to it.

When I awoke the following morning, I got up earlier than ever, in a rush to get to school. I got dressed quickly, randomly pulling on a pair of pants and a T-shirt. I jammed the hairbrush through my hair and brushed my teeth the fastest I could manage, which wasn't all that fast. I stumbled down the stairs, and, for a change, made myself a toast, which I burnt.

Taking a quick glimpse at the time, I noted it was way too early to head off to school. I still had about a half-hour before getting there. But instead of hanging around the house I decided to go to school anyway, I could sit on a picnic table.

I slowly drove out of the drive, and, driving a little slower than the speed limit, made my way to the school. I parked cautiously into the drive and stepped out of my old truck. It was gray, again. And cold, and humid and… Gray.

Suddenly I was surprised by a cold, firm hand around my waist, pulling me in. I was held close against a hard, marble chest, his nose in my hair. I felt the electricity make my heart flap around in my own chest. I gazed up into his eyes, which were onyx. I started pulling away, remembering Saturday.

"No, don't, it's okay," he said, gazing into my eyes. I noticed a sad, faraway look in them.

I had forgotten all my doubts when I felt him with me. I relaxed, letting myself melt into his arms. I wasn't ready for what happened next...

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(A/N: no just kidding I won't end it here)

Both his hands were on my face, his lips gently gliding over mine. I threw my arms around his neck, and much to my surprise, he didn't pull away, instead, he responded and we stayed like that for what seemed a very short eternity.

"I love you, Bella, but it's too late,"

"Wait, what do you mean?" I was anxious again.

He never answered me, the last I saw of him was the blur of his shape as he vanished, for what I knew to be forever.

That made me break down. I fell to my knees, falling on the hard cement, and lay there, not believing any of it….

**A/N: I hope you enjoyed the chapter, I know it wasn't that long, but enough to understand…. I hope.. Thank you for all of your understanding and support. Read my BF Cristalake's fic My Last Breath, it's so much better than mine! Anyway thank you for all the reviews!! Keep reviewing!!!**


	10. Daze

**Chapter 9**

**Daze**

A/N: I'm VERY sorry it took so long for me to update, but, and I'm sure you all understand, my pony was put down last Tuesday, and I haven't been in the best of writing moods. Thanks again to all of you who keep reviewing. (BTW, sorry to CC and maraudergurl, I feel so very very stupid for thinking you were the same person, it's just you always like reviewed at the same time, and a bunch of stuff. Whatever don't mind me, I'm delirious, lol! Thanx for your support!) I have had a few comments that my last chapie wasn't long enough, so if you're wondering why it's taken long for me to post it's cuz I'm trying to make it longer. Anyway, btw, you don't _have _to review only once (special note 4 CC and MG), it's just that I'm "competing" with my friend for the most reviews at chapter 10, and I'm not sure it would be fair if I had 10 reviews from the same person, not that _I _mind, lol! So, just keep it to like 2-3 reviews per chapter, if that's not too much to ask. THANK YOU SOO MUCH ALL!!! N.B: Go read my friend Cristalake's fic, it's the one I'm competing against, it's so good, I really don't stand a chance!

**Bella's POV**

I probably had bruises on my knees, but I didn't care. I didn't care either that I was sobbing my head off in the middle of the school parking lot. My life had just fallen apart with the eight single words he had uttered. I dared not even think his name. So I just stayed there, for minutes on end, sobbing dry tears, not believing, dazed.

I came out of my trance abruptly when Mike jogged up to me, anxious. He started shaking me roughly.

"Bella? Bella! Oh my god, are you okay? Bella?" He ran his hands down my arms, shaking me, forcing me out of my bubble of despair.

I didn't want to feel his hands, no way.

"Leave me alone," I grumbled, somehow managing to free myself of his grasp. I probably achieved it because it couldn't compare to… No I wouldn't even _think _his name.

My response seemed to startle him even more, and he ran off to get help from the nurse. Soon after, she came gently to me and started asking me these annoying questions.

"Isabella, dear" she asked in her high-pitched voice, "What is the matter? Can you see me? Are you feeling feverish?"

I simply didn't answer; I didn't want idiots bothering me at the moment. I just wanted to stay laying here on the hard concrete parking lot. I stared into space; my life had run away from me, so now I was just waiting for my spirit to follow. She kept poking and prodding at me, but I barely noticed her. Nothing would move me.

After an eternity, Mike left to his class, and the nurse disappeared into the office, saying as she went:

"I'm going to call your father, he will pick you up," she glanced worriedly my way, before bustling inside. I didn't care. Nothing meant anything to me anymore. Words didn't have meanings, none of them did, except for one, but that word was a name, and it meant so many things. That name meant my life, but that name was gone, as was my life.

Suddenly, a voice that _did _have some meaning left to it, approached me. It sat down beside my crumpled body. I peeked at her eyes, topaz though they were, looked in no way like his.

"Bella? It's Alice." The name didn't mean much, the voice did however. "You know Bella, you have all your life ahead of you, and many happy times, so don't lose your spirit over him. I know what you're feeling, and I'm so very sorry. You know that fate sometimes can not be changed though, don't you? Anyway, Bella, I know you probably don't care that I'm talking to you right now, and I understand, but I wanted to tell you something. My family is leaving also, I hate to break it to you this way, but we have all agreed that is what's best for you, we have seen that we have monopolized your life, and we regret it…"

I didn't want to hear anymore. First _him _then them? That was too much. I held on tighter to my knees and cried the tears I didn't have. Alice was right; fate couldn't be changed. I was supposed to die from the day I arrived in Forks, and maybe I had been able to push it further into the future, but I'd die anyway, this time in the worst way imaginable.

"Oh, Bella, I'm so sorry!" Alice held up my chin to meet her gaze, but I looked away. "Edward will always love you, you know that. It's why he left. And we will always remember you, I'm telling you, okay?" She hugged me tightly. "Oh! And before I forget, here's something you'll like, I hope, anyway." She handed me a framed picture of Edward, grinning his crooked smile.

That made me burst into a fresh batch of tears. I sobbed uncontrollably. Alice held me tighter, holding me against her chest, whispering soothing words in my ear. "This picture will save you…" She smiled sympathetically. She pulled me to my feet. "Come on, Bella, you're stronger than this, it'll pass. Remember, we love you. Good bye." Alice gave me a last quick hug, before turning away and vanishing.

By this time I wasn't crying anymore. My heart was numb. My brain wouldn't process anything anymore. Then, I heard Charlie stepping out of his car to come and get me. I hadn't even realized that he'd arrived. I mad no move to come to him, however.

"Bella?" he sounded wary, probably hoping he wouldn't have to deal with tears. His face fell when he saw my swollen red eyes, and the dried tear tracks on my cheeks. "Bella, are you okay?" He looked as if he desperately hoped whatever had gone wrong had been corrected.

I knew that I shouldn't put extra weight on his shoulders, and I was sure the last thing he needed right now was a crying Bella in a love crisis. So I did my best to swallow the lump in my throat and face him with the bravest expression I could muster.

"Yes… Charlie," I managed to choke out. "It's fine, I'll manage, I'm not feeling… (gasp) so great, I guess…. (gasp) I just need to rest." I don't know how I actually managed to talk just then, I felt like I was being strangled by a snake inside my throat.

My response seemed to satisfy him though, because he relaxed and took my arm, leading me to his car. I sat down in the passenger's seat, feeling the slightest bit nauseous. I guess saying I felt sick wasn't quite a lie. Charlie drove me home in silence; I figured he wasn't so game to ask me what had caused my outburst. And I certainly wasn't 'stable' enough to manage bringing it up. Simply thinking of it threatened to overwhelm me again. No, not now, when I get to my room… Only that thought made me survive the ride without breaking down in front of Charlie.

When Charlie parked in front of the house I barely waited for the car to be stopped before I ran up to my room. I didn't stop to see Charlie's reaction; I would burst any second. When I finally reached my bed, I allowed myself to unleash the tears that constantly built up in me. I realized I was still clutching the framed picture of… I gasped. The snake was tightening around my neck.

I flung the frame against the wall, shattering the glass. I didn't care. Not now anyway. What was a picture to me? It's not like he would ever come back. Why should I even try to remember him? It was not worth the sorrow. And, anyway, it's not like I could forget him so easily.

The picture swayed down to the ground, and I stopped myself from ripping it up. One, I didn't want to stand up anymore, and two, Alice had told me something about saving me. That was odd, thought because right now all it was doing was killing me. So I wasn't ripping it mostly because of my laziness. And I was sure I'd regret it a few months from now, when I would need him most.

I held myself in a tight ball on my bed, closing my eyes and trying not to think. I rocked back and forth there for hours on end. I didn't even respond when Charlie told me it was supper time; I didn't come down. Luckily, he didn't insist either. After what seemed forever, I crossed my legs and grabbed my music player. I scrolled through the songs, speeding up when I came across Linkin Park. Nothing should remind me of him. I picked out this random song and cuddled up again, but this time I went under the covers.

I fell a sleep a couple of hours later, not minding the music that was still blasting in my ears. That night I dreamt the worst nightmares; basically a replay of the day but in more dramatic, crueler scenes. I tossed and turned all night, drenched in cold sweat when I awoke.

Sunlight was only barely streaming in my window when I woke up for real. My music player had run out of batteries over night, and it lay on the floor; probably due to all my tossing and turning. I groaned and stayed in my bed for a few more minutes. I didn't even bother t go take a shower. I didn't have to please anybody anymore.

I knew Charlie had already gone; it _was _a week day. I was relieved for the little bit of privacy I did have. I sulked around the house, still in a daze.

I wouldn't think of anything. Nothing really meant anything to me. If someone had told me, for example, to not forget to breathe, I would just stare at them blankly. Needless to say, I did not go to school for the following week, and Charlie seemed to take it all in stride. I don't know how or why he did, and I didn't try to.

I gave up on finding something to do all those long, boring, timeless days. I just sat on my bed, listened to music or slept. I didn't think his name, or any of theirs for that matter. By the third day of my trance, I finally took a shower. Even then, however, it was cold, and I didn't stay for long. Who cared? Certainly not me.

I didn't check my e-mails often anymore, and my mother was bound to freak out sooner or later. As it happened, it was sooner. I wasn't surprised. She called one afternoon, which would've been after school normally, but I didn't really have school this week. I answered the phone weakly, and was instantly jolted awake by my mother's high-pitched, breezy voice.

"Oh, dear Bella! You certainly don't sound so good! I knew I should've called earlier! Sweetheart, what's wrong? Are you sick?"

"Uhh… I don't know. I don't think so, Mom. Why?"

"Well, Bella! You sound _awful!_ I really should come and see you! I knew this would turn out bad! You never should've gone to live in Forks! Don't worry darling, I'll be there as soon as possible!"

Those words sort of made me listen better. I didn't want it to pass on Charlie's back. It was definitely fault. "No, no, Mom! Charlie has nothing to do with it! In fact I'm great, I really am! Don't worry about me! It's just a difficult spell, I guess…" I tried to perk up, but it didn't come out so great.

"Are you sure darling? I could really come over and help out, you know. If you're having trouble, I'll come right over."

I knew I was getting to her. Already, she seemed less needy to come and check on me. "Doesn't Phil have some football to attend to? I know you want to be thee with him, don't you? It would be awful to miss it just for me, no?

"Well, I guess so, but, Bella, I really think you should rest, and take care of your self. Call me if anything comes up."

I knew I had convinced her. Already that conversation had taken the only energy I had out of me. "Okay, Mom, I love you, bye."

"I love you too, Bella. Don't forget to check your e-mail."

Then she hung up, and I plopped down thankfully on my bed again. Suddenly, I burst into a fit of tears. Everything was catching up on me yet again. I sobbed and sobbed for hours. That seemed to be part of my routine these days.

Charlie called me down for supper, and I reluctantly went down to the kitchen; he wanted to talk to me. I took my place at the table, staring down at my plate.

"Bella, I wanted to talk to you," Charlie began. I had figured as much.

"You know, I'm very sorry about what happened with Edward, but, sometimes… Anyway, life goes on. And I wanted to tell you this because, I find you look way too depressed for a break-up with your first "crush" boyfriend. I think you should get your mind off of it." He looked at me sympathetically.

How did he know about _him?_ I hadn't ever told Charlie about what had happened with him. But then again, you could never keep secrets in such a small town, no matter how small the number of witnesses.

I swallowed. That was going to take a considerable amount of focus… "Fine"

**Edward's POV**

From the second those eight words parted from my lips, I regretted them. But what was the choice? I couldn't risk her life for me, it was selfish. I hated leaving her in the school parking lot that way, but my thirst was screaming at me. What kind of monster am I?

khgijhI knew I had left my heart there with her, and it would stay there for eternity. Because I wasn't going back. Ever. If I could've I would've broken down in sobs then and there. Unfortunately, I wasn't even human. That's why I wasn't good enough for Bella. That's why I still am not. That's why I never will be.

After our parting kiss, into which I had put all the passion I could muster, considering my raging craving for her blood, just to remember, to have one more memory…But, after that, I knew I couldn't delay. I fled, just like the coward I am. I couldn't stand it, and I was sure life meant nothing to me now. I held on only for Carlisle, and the family he'd built for us. I wish I could say I lived to see Bella again, but I wouldn't do that to her, no, not once again.

So, as I fled through the musty, green humid foliage, I remembered all the great moments of before. But I will always be haunted by the way no matter how hard I try, I always want to… well, _taste _her. I hate myself dreadfully for that.

When I ran, I didn't feel the thrill and exhilaration I usually do, when I run, it was just a fleeing method this time. How much I hoped it could be the way to go and meet her again.

I reached my home, that wasn't my home anymore; we were moving out, we had all agreed it was best, especially for Bella, but for me too. When I stepped inside, I was greeted by the faces that were familiar to me. I didn't bother saying hi. I heard all their sympathies in my head. I fled upstairs, I was in no mood for profound sympathy, I just wanted to be alone, really.

I blasted my stereo, hoping it would drown out my thoughts, and all the others I heard. I was listening to my music, grateful that it seemed to take some of the thoughts out of my head, when I came upon the Linkin Park CD. That hurt. All my Bella memories flooded through me again.

Suddenly, I heard Alice walk in to my room. I was surprised to not have heard her earlier. I guessed the music really did have some effect.

"Edward, I'm so sorry. I left her a picture, you know. I understand how you feel, and if you don't want to talk, just say so…"

"I KNOW you're sorry, Alice," I snapped. I hadn't mean to. "Look, I'm sorry Alice. I didn't mean to snap at you. It's just…"

"It's okay, I know. I told you I understand"

"Actually, you _don't _understand, Alice. You've never experienced it, have you? Do you have _any _idea of how hard it is for me? No, you don't. So, no, I don't think I want to talk. I'm fine. It'll pass. Right?"

"I'm so sorry…" she murmured. She didn't seem all that sincere. And why wasn't she fighting back to my outburst? This wasn't like Alice. She'd _never _no matter what the reason, let that one slip. Something fishy was going on. But her thoughts were normal.

"And, what do you mean, you left her a picture?! How _stupid _are you? She's supposed to _forget _me! Are you trying to _kill _the poor girl?" I yelled, wishing she'd leave.

I thought I saw the corner of her lip pull up in a smile, but whatever trace of it vanished. "Oh, no Edward, quite the opposite."

"What do mean, quite the opposite?! She_ shouldn't _haveeven _met _me in the first place! You're ridiculous! And, please can you leave me alone now? I need _peace!_" I was freaking out. Bella didn't need reminders of me. It should be like she never knew me. But Alice just wrecked that…

"As you wish," she skipped nimbly out of the room, an evident smile playing on the corners of her lips…

**A\N: I hoped you enjoyed it! Please review to let me know how good it was. Don't be scared to tell me if anybody was out of character or anything else, I'd be happy to hear it! Thank you for all the support, I appreciate it! And me and Cristalake have created a Fan fiction file, it's Tearcristals; soon we will post our first fic! Please go read and review! Thank you!**


	11. Hurt

**Chapter 10**

**Hurt**

A/N: Thank you so very much for all the reviews! I LOVE reading them; it makes me all warm and fuzzy inside! I know it took me forever to post, and I'm very sorry, but now it's March break! I hope I'll find enough time to post more quickly for all my faithful reviewers out there!! Anyway, thankies!

Disclaimer: The fictional universe I constantly try to create may be mine, but Edward Cullen never will be… sob (stars don't work)

**Edward's POV**

Alice had always been hard for me to understand. Her thoughts never represented what she was really thinking and she always acted weird at the worst times. This was no exception. Why on Earth would she skip out of my room hardly managing to cover up a _smile?_ Of all things. Her thoughts weren't sad, or sympathetic, either. On the contrary, they were neutral. All I had heard in her mind was stuff like wondering how their next house would be, if she'd get the best room and a future shopping spree.

Then it caught up to me. She _knew _how the next house would look like. She _knew _if she'd get the best bedroom. She _knew_ what she'd get her next time out. I sighed. The only thing _that_ could mean was that she was hiding something from me. _Again. _Frustration swept through me like a wave. I groaned and stood up.

My thoughts drifted away, and finally settled on Bella. In my mind I clearly saw her delicate features, her innocent expression and her cute tendency to stumble upon a flat surface, or her words. I chuckled. It cut off short though, when I felt the sudden pain that seared through my body.

Never before had I experienced such pain. It was almost physical, but not quite. It felt kind of like fire, but even if I'd had ice, it wouldn't have been soothed. I writhed in pain on the floor, growling.

Alice suddenly appeared at the door, but I paid her no heed. The scalding pain wouldn't relent.

"Edward! Oh, what's wrong?" She kneeled down beside my burning body.

I didn't talk to her, or even glimpse at her. Suddenly, the pain switched abruptly. In no way did it stop hurting, but it was altogether a different sort. Instead of a burning, scalding pain, it was more of an electric, jolting pain. I gasped, fighting for breath. A breath I didn't actually need.

Cold sweat pearled on my face. Alice was frantically running a cool cloth on my skin. I shivered.

"Damn! I should've known! Stupid me!" Alice kept on grumbling but her voice became a background drone.

"Alice. Alice, stop. Go… Away." Somehow I managed to get the words out. Nothing she did would help. I knew that as surely as I knew that I'd never see Bella again.

She stopped what she was doing and stared at me, trying to understand. The, she got up and left, figuring it would be best.

Minutes seemed like hours as I lay on the cool ground, twisting in agony. After a seemingly endless eternity, the electricity somewhat relented. Then, gradually it stopped. I didn't attempt to move, for fear it would begin again. When I grew certain it wouldn't I cautiously pushed myself up with my arm.

Questions tumbled through my head. What had triggered this? Would it happen again? Why would it hurt me? All of them, I knew, would stay unanswered.

I made my way to the stairs. We would have to go now. Leave Forks, and Bella, behind forever. In the time I had writhed on the floor, something had occurred to me. Staying here would make me suffer. Leaving more so, but in the long run, if I knew Bella would be happy, I'd manage to be happy also. So, the sooner we left the better…

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**Bella's POV**

The promise I made to Charlie proved to be harder than expected. In no way did I want to socialize. What was the point? I was sure nobody would want to be with me anymore; I was a real zombie these days. I didn't care for anything, or anybody. So the weeks passed, slowly at first, and gradually blurring by faster and faster as they turned into months.

For the most part, I stayed out of Charlie's way; and lied about my relationships with my friends. I would never tell him the real facts. As it was, he wasn't particularly happy about the grades I produced. I was only just barely passing my classes.

One morning, as I was readying myself for school, I stumbled upon the old photograph of Edward. It had been carelessly lying on the floor for a number of months. I gazed at it, my eyes brimming with tears, and I felt my heart rip open. I rushed out of my room before I could concentrate on it any longer.

I couldn't even permit myself to think of any memories, because I knew it would hurt dreadfully. Never had I picked up the picture, for I knew the awful events of _that day_ would mercilessly catch up on me.

I hurried through breakfast, trying to keep my mind off of him, and made it to school early. This was a bad thing, because now I did have time to think about him. I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to hold together the empty hole inside of my being.

I sat in my truck for a long while, and only got out when I saw the lot begin to fill with students. Gratefully, I stepped out of my old red Chevy.

As I walked toward my class, I realized that Mike didn't run up to me anymore. I never thought I think this but I actually wished even Mike would want to see me. I sighed. I wasn't surprised; who would want to be friends with a freaking zombie?

The day crawled along uneventfully. I barely listened to the classes the teachers were giving; what did it matter if I flunked my school year?

By the end of the day, I thankfully plopped down on my car seat, and revved the ignition. I slowly drove home, taking all my time. Only bad memories would flood me from the moment I stepped inside the house.

Unfortunately, in the end I did have to go inside. Busying myself with Charlie's supper helped keep my mind off of everything. I was hopelessly bored with this routine, but wasn't life just that, a boring routine?

When Charlie came home, I had already served supper, and we ate in silence. I was very grateful for that; it was a good thing that Charlie didn't feel the need to fill every silence with words.

We exchanged a couple of comments about the weather, and then I went about cleaning the kitchen, while he went to watch the latest football match.

After scrubbing the pots and pans, I reluctantly made my way upstairs to take a shower. I didn't feel relief when I showered anymore, now it was simply an obligation. I turned on the hot water and let it run for a minute before stepping in. I shivered. The hot cold transitions never were easy for me.

After hurriedly rubbing a towel through my soaking hair I walked to my room and dressed into some old holey pajamas. I rummaged through my drawers to find my CD player; it always managed to hide from me.

However, it wasn't the CD player that I found first; it was the old picture of _him._ I gasped. I had never allowed myself to marvel at his god-like beauty after he left. But now, I didn't have the choice. The scrap of paper drew me to him like a magnet. Slowly, carefully, I picked it up and carried it to my bed.

On my bed, for the first time in months, I just stared. I allowed my bruised up soul to go over every aspect of him. His beautiful liquid topaz eyes, straight aquiline nose and softer, full lips. I imagined those very same lips cool on my forehead. I let my mind wander to all the gentle words they had uttered. I relived all the moments that had created my very own heaven.

It wasn't heaven I felt though, it was hell. In a way, I knew that I would feel some pain, but this was like something I never would've expected. An excruciating fire seared through me. Not only did my heart rip open again, but I would've sworn blood gushed from it.

I wrapped my arms around myself, hoping to extinguish the fire, or whatever was burning up inside of me. I rolled over on my bed, tossing and turning, grimacing with inexplicable pain.

I bitterly regretted letting my thoughts drift to him. It had been the worst mistake of my short life. But maybe it had been worth it. It had given me the time to refresh my memory. And anyway, who cared for pain? It had been all I had felt since he left me. It was better than being numb, right?

Abruptly, the searing pain changed. It was no longer the burning ripping fire, but an altogether different one. It hurt just as much, but vaguely more familiar. Now, where had I experienced it?

I felt incessant electricity zapping through me. I could feel it pounding in my blood, beating in my veins. I ignored the excruciating pain, and concentrated on where I had felt something somewhat familiar to it. Hurt as it might, it was actually reassuring. As if I could feel some connection to him. I sighed, and let myself melt into it, or him?

Too soon, the pain stopped, and Edward left me, again. It's a wonder I welcomed it, for the only thing it represented was his leaving. But I guess I welcomed anything that was somehow related to him.

I let myself sink onto my mattress again, and letting my mind wander to him. I accepted the pain it caused me, and enjoyed it. Anything to know he's somewhere, that I hadn't dreamed him up.

I picked up the picture Alice had given to me. What had she said? This will save you? Well, I guess it kind of did, in a way. But shouldn't there be more to it?

I gazed at the picture for a long while. I let the tears flow freely, and drip silently on the paper. I remembered the evil vampire witch. She had something to do with this. She _had _after all, played with Edward's heart. I sobbed silently, emptying my body of every single drop of water it possessed.

Then, as the picture blurred up, and faded away, I would've sworn I felt an electric jolt…

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A/N: Sorry it took so long for me to post such a _short _chapter. I've been having Internet problems… Grrr… Anyway, I know it's short, but it's hard to have long chapters when there is virtually no action, or no specific goal to it. Thanks a lot to all of you who read and review, it's VERY appreciated!


	12. Shock

**Chapter 11**

**Shock**

A/N: Unfortunately, it will be another relatively boring chapter, but, remember, this will lead to the better part! I have a great idea for you guys later on! I think it's going to be real fun! But for now… Thank you for all the reviews! You guys are all sooo encouraging! Thank you!

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**Bella's POV**

I jumped. I should've gotten used to surprises and unusual stuff by now, but I hadn't. The shock lasted barely a fraction of a second, but it had been enough to bring back even sharper memories. The movie, first touch, first kiss… I drew in a sharp breath. That was precisely it! It was the same electricity that I had felt at first. But why would I feel it, I only did when Edward was around… "Whatever", I thought. "_Nothing _has _ever _been normal since I moved to Forks".

I curled up in my bed and sleep found me, thankfully, quickly. I didn't remember any dreams when I awoke the next morning. Light streamed in through my bedroom window. I stared at it, unmoving. It was Saturday. A sunny Saturday… I rolled my eyes. Everything seemed to be catching up to me now.

I didn't have any plans with friends for the day. But it's not like I had any anyway. Actually, today, I had a _different _plan. A sunny Saturday plan… 

It pierced at my heart as I thought of it. _His _meadow. But I had convinced myself to let it go. Forget about it. The past shouldn't hurt me; I wouldn't let it.

I dressed slowly, reluctantly. Unlike _that _Saturday, I was in no rush to make it to the door. To make it anywhere, for that matter. I tugged the hair brush through my clumped hair, swallowed down my typical bowl of cereal, and opened the door.

I slammed it shut two seconds after. Taking a deep breath, I prepared myself to open it again. I realized how much I really didn't want to go. How I didn't want to remember. How much it hurt me. But there was no turning back now.

I squeezed my eyes shut and stepped out onto the porch. The sun beat down onto my cool skin and reddened my eyelids. I breathed in slowly. Then I opened my eyes and bravely stepped towards my truck. Concentrating on not thinking about what I was about to do, I pulled open the door of the driver's side and sat down gingerly on the worn seat. Revving the engine, I pulled out of the drive, letting out the breath I realized I'd been holding in.

I wasn't sure that I'd be able to remember the exact spot where we'd gone, but I had all day, didn't I? I took the highway, and I drove on for a while, and as the time passed, I started getting panicky. It didn't look like I'd find the exit, much less the small path…

Suddenly, a spasm of familiar electric pain shot through me. Reacting instantly, I let go of the steering wheel to clutch at my stomach. The truck swerved dangerously off to the side of the road, and oddly, I wasn't on the highway anymore. Instead, my truck had stopped on a small dusty side road, and a hiking trail led into the forest …

I gasped, and leaned my head on the steering wheel. Why had this happened? This place was all too recognizable. It was almost as if the electricity had led me here, on purpose. But it didn't have a mind, of that I was sure. Oh well, at least I was here now, and here was where I had wanted to be. I wasn't sure if that was what I still wanted, I was beginning to get spooked, but an insistent pull, which seemed to be of electric nature as well, was urging me along.

I stepped slowly out of the truck and managed to put one step in front of the other. Remembering that the path wasn't the way to the meadow, I made my way in the other direction. This was going to take a while, but hopefully I'd be home before Charlie did and got worried.

The weather looked like it was holding, so that was one less thing to worry about. I trudged on into the woods, grateful for the cool shade provided by the trees.

As the minutes, then hours, crawled by, I stared to wonder if that meadow had been just an illusion, as had probably been Edward; maybe the evil vampire witch had really thought the whole thing up. My legs felt like lead weights, and I repeatedly stopped to sit down on fallen tree trunks to sip at my bottled water.

As I was thinking of turning back, the electricity jolted my being once again. I looked up from the ground that I was slowly leaving behind to look ahead. The sun filtered through the sparsely separated trees, and up ahead, I could discern a small gap, opening up from the depths of the forest.

With the last strands of my energy, I jogged, the fastest pace I could manage without killing myself, toward the sunlight. Soon enough, I emerged into a small, perfectly round clearing speckled cutely with pastel colored flowers. I gazed around in wonder, still as awed by it's beauty than the first time I had come. A wave of melancholy wiped over me, filling me with memories and… electricity. Yes, with every memory came a jolt of than buzzing feeling I now welcomed, for it was actually the last I felt of him.

I plopped down where I was standing, exhausted. I let my tired eyes take in everything again. It pained me, and incessant buzzing racked my body. It really was odd that separation could create such a phenomenon. I sat there, focusing on letting it come back, it hurt, but wouldn't it always? I hated thinking of living my future without him in it, that my husband would naturally be second choice, how would I cope with that? Maybe I'd never even have another boyfriend though; my first one hadn't turned out too great.

After a while, I lay on my back, and welcomed the memories tat brought pain along. In the long run, wasn't pain better than numbness? At least then I knew that my body remembered and it hurt.

Days could've gone by; I had lost all notion of time as I lay in the lush green grass. At some point, I remembered Charlie, and, much against my will got up and trudged homewards again. It was dusk; I had stayed longer than I really should've, but most of the time had been spent walking anyway.

The walk home was shorter than the walk towards the meadow, or maybe it only seemed that way because I hadn't an idea of where I was going when I was going to the meadow. All the same, when I made it to my truck, sunlight only barely streamed in through the evening clouds.

I hopped in and drove away, not even looking back. I had maybe found some earlier memories, but now was the time to forget about them, and live on. Maybe Edward had been but a drug, one that I still needed, that I would always need, but I had to hide it from others, from myself too.

When I drove in, the drive was still empty. Maybe Charlie had gone to a friend's. I didn't bother about supper for him then; I just heated up some leftovers for myself. As I settled myself at the table, I pulled out my schoolwork; I had been on top of it for the past few weeks. There was nothing else to do with the days. It was a desperate case.

I scribbled in the few answers on my note sheet and then rinsed my dishes. I then walked upstairs to get in a shower before a good long read in bed. The hot water soothed my aching bones, and what muscles I had. Those had been mostly stretched cruelly during my too-long trek in the woods.

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**Edward's POV**

Our new home was no exceptionally stunning craft. It was a rather modest-looking century-old mansion. A lot like the old one. But I didn't really pay attention to it. I hadn't either enrolled in school here in Alaska. We had come back to Alaska, but not to Denali because Carlisle didn't think seeing old friends would be such a good thing for me right now.

And he was right. I didn't want to see anybody right now, much less myself. And I had to _live _with myself. Of all people. I couldn't cope with what I had done to her, and I bitterly hated myself for everything I made her live through. Every day and night I would be myself up internally and eventually I lost all notion of time, and all notion of my surroundings. I rarely went out to feed, and only did so when it became crucial.

Actually, I don't know what stopped me from killing myself. Well, I kind of did. If I didn't go out to hunt, some physical electric force dragged me out of the house, forcing me ever inch of the way. And I couldn't do anything about it! Oddly enough, it seemed in some way related to what I had once experienced with Bella. That same kind of electricity like that first day at the movie. And every time it would scorch my burning mind with more painful memories.

Technically it was impossible to push Bella out of my mind; and even if I had wanted to with all my might, it was _physically _impossible. I had lots of pictures of her also. And those were worth fortunes to me, and though I knew it hurt me more to see her and not touch or smell her, I wouldn't burn them or throw them away; they had become my life.

Even though Bella wasn't near me anymore, the electricity seemed to connect me to her in some inexplicable way, and that somehow reassured me. 

After some time however, I began to revel in the pain the electricity caused me, and it caused me lots of pain, sometimes more than others. Because, I reasoned with myself, wasn't pain better than numbness? Yes, it was, because that to, reminded me of her, and after a while I would begin to let the memories flood my mind, and sometimes I would actually lose myself in them. Forget about time and space, and present.

My family barely dared come see me, and I never hunted with them anymore; they seemed to understand that to find my peace I needed lonesomeness. Even Alice seemed to have calmed down, but she seemed strangely cheerful, probably something about the future… And maybe that should give me hope, but I was too reluctant to hope. And anyway, what good was hoping if it only smashed my hopes to the ground when something went wrong?

So, I was alone to be sad, and I was happy about that. I often heard my family's thought about me, and they were all worried, but they sympathized and left me to myself. 

Sometimes I went out into the woods and ran for hours at the time, it helped forget things. Oftentimes I wouldn't come home for a day, but my family never really seemed to worry.

One day, I found a clearing, a lot like the one back in Forks. If I could've cried I would've but all I managed were broken, detached sobs. The electricity burnt through me like lightning, but I had gotten rather used to it.

Minutes blended into hours, the hours into days, the days into weeks and the weeks into months. Nothing in my life changed. Actually, it was rather bring and uneventful. Back to what it had been before Bella. And I couldn't even remember why I had done such a thing. It seemed ridiculous now that I thought of it. And in some odd way, I was sure Bella had forgiven me, and her heart ached just as much. Because that electricity seemed to carry feelings, feelings of another origin…

The more I thought of it, the more I realized that it was me and Bella that were the creators of this electricity. It really did connect us, spiritually, I guess, but it was there to keep us together, and together was how we should be. But now that I had found what I was sure was best for her, and achieved it, I wouldn't allow myself to go back; it would hurt more. And what if she had found another guy? A normal one, maybe? I wouldn't go back. No, I wouldn't, for her sake.

But I was happy about one thing. I seemed to maintain a connection with Bella, and now I welcomed the pain the electricity brought along, and the force wit which it kept me alive and brought me to the places I should be. It was almost a living creature with a mind, and it seemed to watch over my actions.

This reassured me when I most missed her because I knew she was out there alive. And most of all, I waned her to be alive, because I didn't know how she would survive Forks… But now I was gone, so it should give her more of a chance to survive.

I spent most of my time listening to music, and I usually blasted it, my ears were very fine, but at least they couldn't get desensitized.

One day, I went out into the woods, and sat down on an old log just to think to myself for a while. Suddenly, the worst jolt of pain I had ever felt literally seemed to rip apart my chest. Surprised by the impact I fell to my knees and cried out in agony. Between my screams, I heard another voice, far off, calling my name…

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**Bella's POV**

The Sunday following that Saturday, I went out for a leisurely walk in the woods behind my house. The weather was stunning, irresistible. After maybe an hour of walking I came across a fallen log. Weirdly, the electricity had pulled me there, and the second I sat down, the pain overcame me and I shrieked. 

I fell to the ground, wrapping my arms around me, literally thinking my chest would plop out any moment. I yelled and in the blur I realized I was screaming Edward's name. The yells ripping from my throat were so painfully loud they hurt me even more. I went on and on, and it lasted minutes on end, never relenting. 

Eventually, it stopped and a soothing voice that was way too familiar called out.

"Bella, oh my Bella. It's okay. I love you." 

Immediately my screaming stopped and all signs of pain faded. I breathed in deep. "I love you too, Edward." And I knew I would always, and that I loved the electricity that connected our hearts. I lay there, completely satisfied, and though Edward may never come, my delusional mind would always be there to comfort me…

**That's it guys! Maybe you'll have a better shot at guessing? Anyway sorry if ti took so long to post, I've bee way busy! Thx for everything! Don't be afraid to review!**


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